wasnt finished

haha wow i need a second post to
get everything outta my head.

-----------------------------------

you just left.
when ill see you again?
i dont know
youre not coming back.
and i already miss you
well i miss the idea of you that i have
because i know you dont live up to that
not in the least
you dont deserve me
but i still pursued you.
not anymore.
the distance will make it easier to forget.
but i do miss you.
why can't you be what i wanted?
but whatever.
like i said, you dont deserve me.
there's only one person i can think of that deserves me
and youre not him.
i think you were my substitute.
because the one who deserves me, the one who i may not deserve,
well i hurt him. i hurt him bad.
and i dont think he can forgive me
but, oh jeezz i want him to.
i gave my everything to him,
how the heck did i throw that away?!?
and for what?
a couple fun nights away at college?
so not a fair trade.
will he ever forgive me?

well i think hes getting there, :)
we talked last night.
best part of my night

i still love him





wow, crazy internal struggle there ^^^^ huh??

yea anyways, im feeling better.
i need to write more.



T minus 6 hours.